Life Strategies – Page 4

Why you should run a Marathon

December 5, 2017January 10, 2021thecausecoach

You have the strength, the courage, the discipline and the power to bring your dreams to life, to be the change you want to see. You can make your dreams a reality.

To be the person you need to be to achieve your goals – you are going to first run a marathon. Yes, a marathon! YOU are going to finish a marathon. That’s 26.2 miles. I’m going to tell you that you CAN finish a marathon. I will tell you that you DO have enough time, and that you are not too out of shape, slow, old, or whatever excuse you have in your head. Because that voice in your head telling you that you can’t run a marathon, is the same voice that’s sabotaging you in other areas of your life. Read more →

7 Ways to Survive the Holidays after loss

November 21, 2017January 10, 2021thecausecoach

This post is meant as a complement to what I wrote in August about ways to survive and thrive after the loss of a spouse. Holidays obviously can be difficult for anyone dealing with loss. Admittedly, even this year, my fourth holiday season since my husband died, I’ve really only mastered “surviving.”

Last Thanksgiving I hosted “Friendsgiving” (read about it here). That alienated my daughter. Not knowing all of the invited guest very well, she opted to spend the holiday with her friend’s family. So that didn’t feel right either. This year I asked her what she wanted to do. She asked that we cook a meal together (anything but Turkey) and put up the Christmas decorations.

What have I learned about at least surviving the holidays? Read more →

Let’s talk about this – it may save a life

September 12, 2017January 10, 2021thecausecoach

This is National Suicide Prevention Week (September 10-16). We all know what suicide is. We hear about it. It’s something that happens to other people. I remember being touched by a documentary called The Bridge many years ago. I thought about it a lot when I had the incredible opportunity to run over the Golden Gate years later. I could never have imagined then how I would be touched by suicide.

WARNING SIGNS OF SUICIDE

Talking about wanting to die

Looking for a way to kill oneself

Talking about feeling hopeless or having no purpose

Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain

Talking about being a burden to others

Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs

Acting anxious, agitated or recklessly

Sleeping too little or too much

Withdrawing or feeling isolated

Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge

Displaying extreme mood swings

The more of these signs a person shows, the greater the risk. Warning signs are associated with suicide but may not be what causes a suicide.

A challenge to be thankful for one thing everyday

August 17, 2017January 10, 2021thecausecoach

I was going to publish something totally different today and then this morning this “memory” from 2014 popped into my Facebook news feed:

What I’m positive about/thankful for…Day 5 of 5…

1. I can run, as it may be the only thing that’s keeping me sane (I’m also thankful for my amazing coach, Rob McCarthy, who also has me running fast, which is keeping my self esteem at an all time high);

2. I’m thankful for my friends…all of you…and especially a few in particular (who I won’t call out here in fear that someone not included may feel slighted)…the really special ones – you know who you are – you have been there when I needed you, you knew when to make me laugh, when to just listen, when I needed a pep talk, you knew the right thing to say, or knew when it was best to say nothing at all , you’ve made the last 5 months fly by and made sure I knew I was a survivor. Thank you!

3. And finally, my dog, because when all else fails, I never doubt that at least HE loves me.

12 Ways to survive – and thrive – after the loss of a spouse

August 8, 2017January 10, 2021thecausecoach

Several of my friends have lost their spouses over the last couple of years, and I’ve lost a few Facebook friends as well. You naturally assume that when people get to a certain age, this would not be an uncommon occurrence, and therefore expected. But we are not of “a certain age.” These were people in their fifties or sixties with presumably years left to live.

How does one go on after losing a spouse they had planned to be with for years, if not decades, to come? When I was the CEO of Gilda’s Club (a cancer support organization), we referred to our members – people living with cancer – as the experts. The idea was that the experience of someone with cancer, or living with the reality of a loved one’s diagnosis, made him or her an expert in living with that experience. The medical community was certainly experts in treating the disease, but without the experience of actually “living with cancer” they were not experts in living, only in medicine.

So why am I telling you this? Well, after an eight-year period in which I lost both of my parents, a close aunt and uncle, four jobs, my dog, and my spouse too, I consider myself an expert of sorts in managing grief. So for those of you dealing with this type of loss (and this may apply to someone dealing with an unexpected separation and divorce as well), here is my “expert” advice.